As you ladies and gents start prepping your sequined dresses and bowties (not necessarily respectively) for the coming night of hammered debauchery, I am thinking back on 2012 and some personal things I hope to improve upon for the next twelve months. Hopefully if I post them for anyone to see, I’ll feel obliged to keep them. Or some of you will throw this back in my face. Either way it seems effective. So here they are, my New Year’s resolutions!
1. Be a nicer person.
This has been the only goal that I’ve really thought for more than the past week. I know that the theatre world gets cut-throat and competitive, but I’ve noticed that there is a lot of pessimism and negativity around me lately, and I think that too much of it is coming from myself. I am very accustomed to a systematic deconstructing and criticism of the art that my peers create at school, and I really don’t like that part of the environment. I know we are at school to learn and analyze what makes effective art, but I’m tired of how we Northwestern theatre students cut down things as opposed to focusing on the potential value. So, per MJ’s request, I’m going to start with the man in the mirror on that one. I’ve also noticed that all of the successful people I have met in the entertainment industry in Chicago are genuinely nice people. I have to say, it almost surprised me. Apparently talent is honestly only half the battle. If I want someone to hire me, I’ve got to be a person that they want around, and that’s not going to happen if I hold on to my occasional bitchy tendencies. So that’s my major goal.
2. Be more self-aware.
A big goal for 2012 was working on my self-confidence. I think I got that one pretty much down. In fact, if I keep working on it, I might start getting into the dangerous territory of too much self-confidence, so we’ll just try and hold that one at its current level. What I’m not so proficient at yet is my self-awareness, in that I don’t think I am very apt at knowing how I’m coming off to people. It normally takes the amicable warnings of friends for me to realize that I am currently acting like a total douche or a caffeine-overloaded crazy person. I hope that during 2013 I can learn how edit myself a little more effectively so that I don’t repeat the plethora of misunderstandings and misinterpretations that I caused last year.
3. Come out to the rest of my family
It’s super scary and I’ve been trying to find the right time, but presently, only my mother, the older of my brothers, and my maternal grandparents know about my sexuality. It’s been a little difficult with those four, because I came out to them as “queer” and I really don’t think they understand what that means, even though I tried to explain. When I get around to the rest of my family, I might just use the word “gay” even though I don’t necessarily identify that way, it just simplifies things.
4. Read for pleasure more
I’ve recently been talking to people who spend a lot of time reading for pleasure. I used to do this a lot through middle school and high school, and during the past years at Northwestern, I’ve really let it slip away from me. In my life, I am constantly multitasking, but maybe I can find some time to run on the elliptical and read some more of those fantasy novels I love ever so. But knowing my over-committed lifestyle, that’s very ambitious.
5. Take better care of my skin
I feel good about the changes I’ve made to my hair in the last year, now it’s really time to start working on that face. As of now, I barely do anything to it unless I have a really bad breakout. I don’t think my skin is too bad, but it’s not perfect, so I hope to add some good skin care into my daily routine.
I won’t put it on the official list, but I also consider this blog a New Year’s resolution of sorts. I think I have been pretty good about keeping it up over my winter break, and I hope that I stick with it once I get back to school. For those of you who have been reading, thank you so much! Your kinds words have really helped me commit myself to this blog and I think it’s off to a good start.
So there you have it. These are the goals I am throwing myself at this year and their general order of importance. In the past, it has been a struggle to make it past January with my resolutions, but the one’s that stick have really made a positive impact on my life, such as three years of vegetarianism! So I hope that I can report back to you all and say that I’ve stuck to them. I’ve got my fingers crossed.
Have fun and be safe tonight, my loves! I want to see A LOT of comprising, drunken pictures.
Stay hot and keep it messy,